My Word of the Year

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Whenever I visit with folks in person from this creative online world, of course, our word of the year comes up.  I told a friend my word of the year recently and I confessed that I hadn’t spoken my word aloud online.  When I spoke it we burst into laughter because, well, its the kind of word that needs to be spoken aloud.  Keeping it silent is pretty much the opposite of the word itself.

And the word is: Confidence

Here’s the thing though. Just like any other word, when you put the intention out, it takes hold and creates a focus for your year.  Though sometimes not in the way you expect!

When I chose the word confidence, I wanted a word that would help me thrive in both my personal life and business.

It isn’t a glamourous word to chose as your word of the year.  Not at all.  But I’ve seen over the past few years that when I pick a word that becomes a focus for my year, big things can happen and they aren’t always pretty.  Oh, like the year I chose the word thrive.  The year I made gigantic changes in all the ways I was merely surviving…not always a pretty picture.

I knew there were some big changes that I wanted to make in this year including being proactive about dating, evolving my business and diving into some big-dream truths.  I knew that if I picked a word that was a bit less vulnerable, well, it might not be helpful.  I wanted to step up this year in a lot of ways.  So I went for it, for the unglamourous but the truth behind all of the thing that I really wanted to change in my life.

Is finding confidence.

I confess I’ve had this post as a draft for a long time now (i even accidently published an old version of it…if that showed up in your blog reader, thats why).  I wanted to wait for a time when I really felt confident, when I felt like that sassier, more confident version of myself who made bold business decisions and exuded confidence.

There has been lots of moments that that felt true and many that it hasn’t.

What I’m learning about confidence is that it really isn’t just only about the outward expression.  It isn’t just about extroversion and what we present to other people.

Like those words I found written on a wall near my house, I’m learning about being more self-confident and supportive to those parts of myself that don’t fit it.  To be totally truthful, its not all that hard to be bold and confident in the ways that are socially welcomed in a certain situation or in society in general.  I’m discovering that maybe true confidence exists in embracing those parts of ourselves that may not always be welcomed with open arms but finding ways to love ourselves (in the ebb and flow process of self-love) no matter what.

Its not just about an outward expression of confidence, or at least, that doesn’t seem to be the end result (its never really what we envision it to be on January 1st, is it).  Sure, I really welcome more moments of sassily feeling confident in my own skin, feeling brave in dating and business but I’m really all good with whatever else confidence has to teach me in the coming months.  I think it is a pretty darn good word to have chosen after all.

I’m getting some glimpses of some ways that my business could change drastically if I chose to.  The word confidence might make you think that I want to start trying to be the next big thing, but its actually quite the opposite.  I think I’m dialing in to a deeper purpose in the work that I’m doing, one that could make for some big shifts in my offerings but that might feel even more in alignment with what I feel like I’m meant to offer in this lifetime.

So, I figured it was high time that I spoke that word aloud.

Confidence.

Bring it on.

{And I’d love to hear what your word of the year is and if you’re having any half-a-year into it revelations}